[x]MOOD - serious, thinking hard
[x]MUSIC - Garbage - Thirteen
Serious Subject.
If you are easily offended dont read my post. And if you object to anything i say, realize that this is my journal and i am completley entitled to having my own opinion. As you are entitled to your own, and i respect each and everyones opinion. I know many of you will not like what i have to say, but i was taught to say whats on my mind, and i have seriously been thinking about this for the past week. hate me if you want.
I am the most un religious person i know. i dont believe in god. i'm not even one of those people who believes in science instead of god. i have only ever taken a serious interest in science in the last year. i just choose not to believe in a higher form of being. if you do believe, thats great and i am really happy and proud that you have something that helps you. not believing helps me.
i'm not going to get into religion. i will try not to. i know that i am easily going to insult some of my best friends here.
but for the past week, i have been thinking about a few serious things that ultimatley in olve religion. First i guess i shall talk about that movie. i have no qualms with it at all. All this hooplah about it is getting a little ... not rediculous, but i dont know how to say it. anyways. i have no problem with the movie. I'm not going to go out and see it. but i have nothing against it.
next would be the movie i watched yesterday in SF called 'Contact'. that movie seriously made me think long and hard. it made me view myself in a completley different light. i am so accustomed to my own views that yes i do know that most of the world believes in some form of religion, but it never really registered in my mind that religion can shape whole countries decisions. There wasa quote in the movie that struck me.. not as odd or funny.. it just struck me. The quote was that 5% of the world dows not believe in god. and that that 5% spend most of their time thinking that 95% of the world is delusional.
in the movie, the main character was stoped form going into space because she had no faith in god. she believed in science. And whole events were stoped and she wasnt alowed to do so much becasue she did not believe. In the end she is perscuted because she does not believe. the americans dont believe that her trip to visit the ailens in space actually happened. they think it is a hoax. yet if it was a religious person they would have believed that it was a vision or something. it bothered me that you can be persuctuted for not believing and also persuctued for believeing in some other god than 'God'
today during the groups presentation about 'Contact' one girl made some comment about not really understanding why the authour of the book/movie did not believe in god, that he died a unbeliever. i just found that interesting. i need to mull that over for a week or two.
and lastly this has been bothering me forever. if you love someone and they love you and you two wish to get married, then you fucking well should be able to. there should be no restrictions other than age and like you cant marry your father or something. but just becasue the two lovers are of the same sex, does not in any way make them unequal to two loves of different sexes. I have never cared for politics at all. yet i have never hated a president of the united states more. where did he get the idea that a) everyone in america believes in god and b) that they all believe in the same god as him. thank you canada. we can legalize gay marriages, yet the apparent 'superpower' of the world has decided to go back to the middle ages.
just at a time when american media has made it cool and vogue to be gay or 'queer' with shows like QE and will and grace. it's apparently ok to be gay, yet you just cant be normal and get married. bullshit. that is complete and utter bullshit. i dont care if you think that god finds it immoral. thats your opinion and it does not reflect the opinion of the whole country. what the hell is leagilizing gay marriages going to do to you? nothing! it's not like you need to be for it. let them get married! it's not going to personally hurt you.
i feel sorry for Americains. and basically everyone who is involved in that.
i could go on more. expecically since i have been learning and debating gender inequality, gender identity and transgenders in sociology. i have so much to say on this, but i feel that i can inedaquatley put it into words. i have never been good at saying things that i feel pasionatley about.
i can only say this now. i never really thought that i would be on the same side as Roise O'Donell. but all i have to say to her is congradulations and you go! good for you and to those 3000 couples in San Fran who have stood up to this rediculous idea and gotten married.
we live in a sick sad world. an apparently equal rights filled world, where no one shall be persucuted based on race, gender, or sexual orientation.
[x]MOOD - tired dammit
[x]MUSIC - No Doubt - Hella Good Acoustic
[-36 more days, 21 more school days, one essay, one observations, two presentations and four exams-]
from the lack of comments.. i'm taking it that either no one looked at my pictures or they did and didnt enjoy them
your loss
so.. today I went to Wendy's to get food (duh) and i was walking back up the stairs of the Student Center and i triped over my own two feet, and i was actually wearing running shoes today as opposed to my usual platforms, but i grabed my food, it was in a bag, and nothing fell and my drink didnt spill. people were already staring at me. then as i was still recovering from my fall.. i kept on falling and i spilled my fries everywhere. like the whole second floor was staring at me. I went and sat down, and Nadia hadnt seen me fall. but everyone else did. :(
then i watched a movie is SF called 'Contact' i swear to god i've seen some of it on an airplane or something.. but i dont remember. it came out in 97 and i didnt go on any planes in 97.. but i so vageuly remember it. Maybe it was another movie. bah.
here, for your enjoyment... SONG SURVEYS!! YAY!! then i shall go do my research thats due tomorow. Joe and i had to tear the libary appart yesterday trying to find shit, and i dont know if i found it or not. Stupid SF.
Step 1: Open your itunes/musicmatch/whatever you use to play MP3s
Step 2: Put all of your music on random.
Step 3: Write down the first 20 songs it plays, no matter how embarrassing.
1. Aimee Allen - In the Sun
2. Garbage - Happiness pt 2
3. Dido - Life For Rent
4. Marilyn Manson - Valentines Day
5. Elan Atias - Slave to Love
6. Appleton - Dont Worry
7. No Doubt - Everything in Time (London)
8. No DOubt - Love to Love You
9. Bush - Mouth
10. Angelfish - Mummy Can't Drive
11. Garbage - Cup of Coffee
12. Kittie - Do you think i'm a whore
13. Moulin Rouge Soundtrack - El Tango de Roxanne
14. Nirvana - You know youre right
15. Britney Spears - Toxic ..... dont ask
16. Billie Piper - Something deep inside
17. The Distillers, Garbage, No DOubt - Call ME Live
18. Joydrop - Beautiful
19. Hole - Celebrity Skin
20. Cardigans - Erase/Rewind
i put all the songs on my computer on... i have some strange songs, i should like delete some
Oh, and candice, i think there may be something wrong with your blog, everytime i visit it it crashes my computer, so it's been like a week since i was able to visit.. maybe it's just me, but i dont have another working computer to check it on.. i dunno
So i did have more to say about the party last night.. but i'm tired. Even on like 11 hours of sleep. Well, more like 10. But i needed to sleep. And now i'm really need to tidy my room and fold my laundry or else i wont get any of my essay done today and i need it finished so my parents can edit them. Since no one else really will edit them becasue everyones so fucking busy. But if you will volunteer please comment, if you dont want to, dont worry about it.
But emilys party was FUN .. i give it 4 stars. and a big hug.
fuck.. so tired. and i came home at like 12. but it didnt feel early. I guess were not the party hardy kind of people. we dont really get drunk, we get more buzed. we have intelectual conversations and spend our time just talking or hanging out. Though there was thet whole group that spent the time watching the hockey game or tv. like it's just a sport, get over it. it's not the playoffs or anything. meh. then there was the cool group that sat in a circle and played with playdo for awhile. fun times.
I was gonna upload pictures, but i dont have time to get them off my camera because my computer dosent have a USB port so i have to do it on another computer, and both my computer and the other one have broken in the past week and are fucked up. But i may begetting a new computer soon. And it's $700 but not an HP. *tear* i love my little HP computer.
argh.. my dad just said that we could go buy it now becasue it's not gonna stay there forever. but i need to write my essay....arrgh. i dont have time to do the whole new computer thing. arrrgh. i need to write now. aaoadbofasdpiahdwnaqfdwn. argh
[x]MOOD - good
[x]MUSIC - Robbie Williams and Nicole Kidman - Something Stupid
So Emilys whole Christmas Party in Febuary was good :D .. i'm a little tired so i may post more indepth about it later today after i sleep and put pictures once i upload them. But it was fun. I'm surprised that no one got drunk. Mina, Vin, Candice and i were like the roving drinking party. We started out in the kitchen, then moved to the dining room then ended up in the family room. But it was fun. I saw some people who i havent seen in awhile, and i huged loads of people. And those of us in the drinking party had an indepth discussion about our boobs. It was enjoyable. haha.
So i went to my Anuts today for a baby shower. It was ok. I only wanted to shoot myself half of the time. And it was kinda funny becasue both of my cousins are big Orlando Bloom fans, and i was like 'oh, i know someone whos friends with Orlando' .. then my sister chimed in with, 'she'll tell mike to say hi next time he sees Orlando' ... they so bought it all. Yes i do know Mike or Anson as i have called him previously, and he was the Assistant Director on Troy and Gladiator. But i'm not like friends with him or anything. I've like talked to him twice. But i am friends with his mom, and kinda friends with his girlfriend.. but anyways. The point of this whole story was that one cousin whos a bitch anyways was like 'so what?' but my other one freaked and was ready to go stalk poor Mike.
[x]MOOD - tired... brain is MUSH!! MUSH I TELL YOU!!
[x]MUSIC - Nancy Sinatra - These Boots are made for walking
Thank you all of you who left the lovely comments. I enjoy this layout as well :D it classes up the joint, god knows normally my layouts are very .. uh.. un-classy.
So i am in the mindst of something completley Mindnumbing and i'm either going to pull my hair out or run around laughing hysterically. I think that University should be everything multiple Choice and Short answer. Fuck these essays. I hate hate hate research essays. And this one is about Early film in Australia. It's an ok topic.. just mindnumbing. i think that i'm loosing all my talents at writing by writing this drivel that is called essays. argh.
anyways.. i did have a point. yes, i sometimes do have those.
I just came here to post some pictures becasue i thought these were funny as hell. Now dont get me wrong. I enjoy Christina Aguilera. I liked her whole 'Dirrty' phase and gave her props for that. But this little 'i'm a whore from the trailer park whose trying to be edgy by dyeing my hair black and prancing around with my boobs falling out becasue i dont want to be typecast etc etc etc' .. well i give you whore and whorete. (note: i also enjoy Pamela Anderson, not just becasue shes canadian, i had a guilty pleasure for watching VIP) anyways. here you go. enjoy and laugh like i did.
umh.... dare i even ask why Christina looks like a disco ball on crack?
oh.. she is a disco ball on crack.. got it
if none of the images work for you becasue i didnt put them onmy server go here.. i just direct linked which is bad and i hate peopel like me but meh ... if you want me to put them on my server then you go write my essay for me
wow... i just babbled on forever about nothing. I'm good at that.
:: i wanna change everything, i want to blame everything on you
::
[x]MOOD - tired.... cramps
[x]MUSIC - Aimee Allen - Revolution
i am really in love with this layout. it just seems so .... classy? i have been trying to think of a layout idea forever. I made a Shirley Manson one and i started on a Christina Aguilera one.. and nothing seemes right. But this one really works for me. Again, like last time i have a small problem with the side bar, but i can live with that.
Is it just me , or is everyone online becoming very bored with their journals/personal sites? Maybe it's just me, because i know that i'm starting to feel that way, which i hate. But i think i have a different reason than most. But anyways, no ones updating, no ones commenting when anyone does update. It just seems so empty and lifeless. I think people are generally very bored. Normally, when i had dial up i would try as ofen as i could to check and update. But now with one computer broken, the other one slow, it just seems like a chore. Nevermind. i lost my train of thought, and my point entirely, if i ever had one. Meh.
I am enjoying reading week, except that i actually tried to work today. but i was in sooo much pain that i had to go take a bath and lie down. I did start typing my notes for my essay and i got two and a half sources out of like 6 typed. thats like 2 pages, so i'm feeling pretty good. I may type more later, and i need to read loads and research more before i can actually start the damm thing. I fucking hate with a passion, research essays. Nikki from WR said the same thing today. My problem is that when i'm doing an essay i just like to write, write and write some more. But with this it's so slow and time consuming. arghh. and the only other time i had to write a research essay i did reeealy bad. i think. i cant remember. i know i hated the whole process. And whenever i had to do 'Reviews of Literature' (basically research notes in essay form .. FUN FUN) in my Social Sciences class, it was like pulling teeth. and i did really bad on those.
[x]MOOD - happy =)
[x]MUSIC - Courtney Love - Hold on to me
So today was a fun fun day.
I slept FOREVER and a day, then Em called me and we went and terroized the folk at the mall. I actually bought myself birthday and christmas presents from last year. Big shocker, expecially considering that my birthday is in november.
But i actually found stuff to buy.. whoo! And the most surprising thing is that they came from Winners, that place has some good shit. I or rather my mom's debit card bought me a hoodie with a zipper.. i have needed new ones since forever, and since my nice black one from old navy has gone missing!! if anyone like sees it at their houses for some strange reason, so give it back. I think kathleen may have it, but shes looked. I shall have to search her room again like i did for my missing makeup last year.
i digress
so i bought the hoodie for only $16. hello? deal. and i bought a couroyry (sp? you get what i mean) jacket.. for like $35.. very pretty. That was all from my mom because she owed me a hoodie and $50 worth of christmas presents form my great aunt. she still owes me like $20 now. and then i bought myself the Courtney Love cd with a gift card from my birthday, i bought a sweater and summery PJ pants both for only $16 at old navy. that was with christmas money.
now i want to go shopping again and buy loads more stuff. i want to clean my room and redo it an shit. and i need more clothes for my wardrobe. it's seriously lacking in, well, everything. I think the only thing i have loads of are underwear, becasue i have like a fetish for La Senza. i heart that place.
this is a very girly entry. I feel all bubbly and spring like. I WANT SPRING TO COME NOW!! NOWW!!! NOW!!! ... weeeee.. giddy
so i am now a DeviantArt member. whoo for me. if youre nice i shall send you my page, but it's a personal kind of thing. this is just for me, and i like that. this blog is mostly for keeping up to date with friends and for basic ranting purposes.
i'm off to attempt to make a new layout. but no great ideas are happening. it's just that people keep on searching 'B r o d y D a l l e' and they come here becasue they think it's a fan site, bot a personal blog.
[x]MOOD - cold
[x]MUSIC - Sunny Day Real Estate - Every Shining Time You Arive
so i deleted part of my last post. None of you cared anyways, and it's not going to change anything at all. So why the fuck shoud i waste my time.
moving on.
I forgot to mention this, but my dad is like the bestest ever. He got me 4 tickets to go see No Doubt and Blink 182 in Clevland, well it says clevland, but really it's like half an hour away. And he got me a hotel room for the night after the condert. So now Jacob, Gwendolyn, me and possibly Emily will be going down on June 12th. Whooo! i cant wait. I'm excited, but not so much because it's so long away, and i have a shitload of stuff to do first. But it shall be an adventure.
So yesterday was a fun filled Drew Barrymore night. For some strange reason. I watched 50 First Dates in the theaters, which i highly recomend. Then i came home and The Wedding Singer was on tv. I didnt watch much because i'd just seen a movie with the two of them. Then at like 2am when i couldnt sleep, i went downstairs and CTV was playing Never Been Kissed i *heart* that movie sooo much. Michael Vartan is very hot, and the whole movie is just cute. So i stayed up till 3:30 to watch it, even though i should have been sleeping, but it's sucha good movie.
I feel like an invalid. My head is driving me up the wall. It's like i have two knives stabbing into the base of my skull.. i thought it was related to my pinch nerve up there, but thats higher and only on one side, and a different pain. So this is not a good pain, if it's still driving me nuts tomorow i shall consider going to the doctors because it's been bothering me since Thursday. Fun Times.
hahahahahahha... i was just looking at my stats.. and my search terms... one of them was 'killmekillmekillmekillmekillmekillme' ... hahaha.. people actually search that and come to my site. Most of the search terms are for Brody, which i guess since there arnt that many sites out there it's understandable.
I shall be making a new layout this week.. it was going to be Wonder Woman #2 - Shirley Manson. But i've done tons of Shirley layouts, so i shall make it about someone else.
[x]MOOD - happy
[x]MUSIC - Elan Atias ft Gwen Stefani - Slave to Love
I dont think i've said this before, but I reeally love this song I've been listeing to it on repeat for weeks. It's from the 50 First Dates soundtrack, which I am considering buying, which is strange because It's sooo not me. BUt The songs make me happy, so why not. I need something to make me feel warm, which in the freezing pit called Markham, does not hapen very often. I cant wait for summer. When Mina and I said exactaly the same thing at the very begining of 50 First Dates today'I want to be there.. right now' about Hawaii. Warmth. I crave it.
THANK YOU. To Mina and Candice. You two are super friends and it's nice to know that people care about me. I'm grateful that i have two amazing friends like you guys, your comments and phone calls made me feel special. And candice i hope your arse is better =) tee hee
I have lods to talk about... but my head is killing me. thats one of the things to talk about, i have sharp pains like daggers in the back of my head. I think it may have something possibly to do with my pinch nerve back there. Meh. I shall write more tomorow maybe. I want to talk about the movie and more of today.
[x]MOOD - exhausted, twitchy
[x]MUSIC - Garbage Live in Austin TX - Temptation Waits
so i have a whole week off. Fuck yeah. Sleep here i come. But i think i'll spend much of the time writing essays and preparing for my two presentations. whoo! i will never escape York.. NEVER NEVER NEVER!
so, not much to say. well lots has been going on in my head, but i havent been able to talk about lots of it because most people are stressed and not really wanting to talk. And i dont know if i really do want to talk.
I had a sociology exam yesterday and a bio one today. whoope.
I had a panic attack on the way home. i talked to my mom about and cried. i'm ok, i think shes one of the only people who i can talk to about that shit, because shes been there and understands it all.
My dad bought me Roses for Valentines day... i hate Valentines day sooo much. Almost more than Christmas. i just hate commercial holidays. Which leads me to this... here, enjoy. I think this reflects Valentines Day perfectley.
Now something that really bothered me was the Grammys. It's not that i generally care for the Grammys at all, but is it just me or were they totaly crap this year and seemed unlike the Grammys at all. There were some good parts, but basically i should have just watched the first half an hour and then not wasted my time at all. I thought the Grammys were off to a great start when Gwen presented right off the bat, but it started going downhill from there. No Doubt won which was amazing, Ellen Degeneres was funny as hell as were Mathew Perry and John Mayer. They get two super duper thumbs up for makong me laugh which is fucking hard right now. But other than those four small points, the Grammys were total bullshit.
I think the main thing that bothered me was that it was more of a concert than an award show. Like isnt there suposed to be awards there somewhere? If i was an artist i would be pretty pissed if i won something, but no one knew it because it was never shown on tv. And arnt Awards Shows suposed to be like glamourous and special, you should feel privliged to be there. If you hold it in a fucking Arena instead of a Theater, it makes the whole thing tacky. I hate it when shows do that. Like you could see the people sitting behind the stage, the stage had no back. I could go off about the Arena thing forever so i shall stop.
Basically it was all total bullshit, i dont evenm know why i bothered watching. the preformances were total and absolute crap. No offence to anyone who likes all the music that was played, but I'm not black, and i dont like much of the music that they played. I'm sure that there is more kind of music that the Grammys could have recognized. Bah. Whatever. I shall stop ranting about that all. I give up. Who fucking cares.
And if you were offended by anything that I just said, keep it to yourself. Or send me hate mail. I enjoy hate mail. It makes me laugh.
So... moving on.
The Sarah Brightman concert on Friday was good. i woudl talk about it but i'm pretty pissed right now, so i shalnt. I had never been to Hamilton before. Nothing special. It was just one of those things. Why woudl i go there?
Three people got murdered down the street from me. For those of you who know the area It was at Warden and Denision. Thats fucking freaky. I used to feel pretty safe here. Not so much anymore. People dont die very much in Markham, and three at once is freaky.
My parents are starting to worry about me. I thought i was doing a good job keeping it all hidden, but they are the first to notice, so i guess this is a good thing. But no one else has noticed that I'm seriously depressed again, but then i know that we all are fucked right now, and the only peopel i see are Em and Candice, and we are all so stressed that it dosent make a difference between stressed and depressed. I'm pretty good at keeping it all in at school, but as soon as i get home i sit around and do nothing. I have two exams this week. i havent started to prepare at all. And i dont care much which kinda freaks me out. I think i may end up blowing this year, i hope York dosent kick me out. I couldnt deal with that. I havent started my essay either. But i did start my research so bonus points for me.
Em and i were playing hide and seek in the Library today. I dont think youre suposed to do that, being that were mature University students and all. Mature us? year right. It was fucking funny, so it was worth it.
[x]MOOD - tired, as usual
[x]MUSIC - Dido - Isobel
pictures.. theyre very big.. so i'm only gonna post one here.. you have to click on the links to see the rest.. it's worth it... a veery cute baby, i dont know if i've ever really held a baby before so this is something you wont see very often. Her name is Willow and shes very cute, and she looks very white, not half black at all. dosent make a difference, shes still cute =)
so i have a very busy weekend coming up...which sucks becasue i need to badly write my essay for Film.. i need to e-mail my TA a proposal right now and see if i can actually do my topic for my essay. but i'm sooo tired that it's not going to be very coherent and he will think i'm on drugs or something.
so tomorow looong ass day of school.. but were watching Gattaca which is good.. i enjoy Ethan Hawke.. then on friday more loong ass school, then i am apparently going to Hamilton friday night to see Sarah Brightman (?) ok... i hope i'm back in time to watch Sex and the City.. i <3 that show, so sad that it's ending
then saturday morning i have a funeral, then saturday night i'm doing a charity movie thing thats like over night so i'll end at 10am sunday.. so hopefully i can work on my essay sunday night
so tired... oh and Mina we need to talk about our Valentines day.. how were gonna get there and all.. wee.. MINAS MY VALENTINES!!!
Oh and SUPER GOOD NEWS!! NxD and Blink 182 are having a tour in June, and my parents ahve said that i can go down to cleveland to see them.. whooo!! yes.. i will take a 6hr road trip to see NxD.. i <3 them that much.. i hope Em can come with me... i dont want to spend 6 hours alone in a car with jacob and gwen... not that i dont like them, but 6hrs is 6hrs
i just found out that a family friend, someone who was essientally my mom's aunt growing up, just died.
death is so sad and destructive. to think that i spent much of my life wising that i was dead, that i wasnt here. when someone dies, i just cant deal with it. i dont like death, but i have grown used to it in a way.
now i think i'm gonna cry
my mom was just in my room crying, death always hits her the hardest
So.. since no one has commented on the new layout.. does anyone like it? i spent FOREVER on it and i'm so very proud of it, if it all works out i shall make this 'Wonder Women' theme continue from layout to layout
fuck i'm tired... sorry if nothing makes sense, i cant think straight right now
So this layout features the amazingly wonderful B r o d y D a l l e.. or B r o d y A r m s t r o n g as i still call her in my head. It makes me very happy to look at it, it's the orange. i KNOW that bright colours make people happy.. yet i keep on doing black or white layouts. oh well.
i think i'm going to roll over and die right now. It's not even 8pm and i feel like i got hit by a truck.
shoot me.... tired.... i was going to write a cherent description of my layout, but shoot me before i fall asleep. I'm off to watch AI then a nap.
name: Sarah Louise
age: 18
birthday: November 21home: toronto
nationality: canadian school: York University
status:Singlework: unemployed height:5'2 eye color:brown/topaz hair color:Brown but
dyedBLACK as INK
